If Cotton Candy were a living, breathing entity, it’d be a cold and vile creature, living in the shadows and occupying most-wanted lists from coast to coast. Like cake, it is celebratory in appearance, but don’t be fooled! It’s not your friend, not like cake. The silly-looking confection aims to render its victims helpless at first sight and then go in for the kill. It is so sickly sweet to most everyone it meets, but underneath its fluffy, pastel exterior lies a dark inner core that no light could ever penetrate. And you needn’t worry about the sugar rotting your teeth; they will most certainly shatter if you bite deep enough into its black heart!
Cotton Candy wants to appeal to your most natural desires: it wants you to want it! And once you submit to its innocent charm, it’ll fill your head with that all too familiar sugar high, causing you to go wild with childish delight. And don’t get behind the wheel of a car; you’ll surely crash it! The delirium you experience will cause a range of traumatic events, including robberies and suicide, to name a few. You’ll go mad!
So the next time you find yourself at the carnival, don’t fall prey to its sly and cunning ways. When the pink devil sees you coming, it’ll most certainly beckon to you and empty your pockets in exchange for its allure. Be prepared. Avert your eyes and shield your children, for they are the most tempted and susceptible to Cotton Candy’s evil ways.
This piece was written as an exercise for a Creative Non-Fiction class I’m currently taking through the University of Toronto’s School of Continuing Studies. After having posted the completed exercise, the instructor inspired a wanted poster visual. Well, I just had to explore that.